so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
he told me I talked like a deaf person
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Randomize
