I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
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