Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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