that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
We named our party play list daddy issues
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
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