sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
Randomize
