I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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