talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
