So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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