We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Even my vagina gasped.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize
