Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
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