look no pants
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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