Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
Why can't burritos get me drunk
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Randomize
