tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize
