hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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