all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
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