There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize
