i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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