Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Randomize