Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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