Sponge bath it is.
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
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