He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
