i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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