a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
