Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
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