Texts From Last Night

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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I just made out with a guy for $7.

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  (603): I just made out with a guy for $7. http://tfl.nu/nc9g
  Replies (17) Good night (1487) Bad night (685)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical

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  (314): I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical http://tfl.nu/2sib
  Replies (2) Good night (756) Bad night (1525)
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  (909): View more from California

  We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.

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  (909): We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter. http://tfl.nu/smvu
  Replies (12) Good night (5662) Bad night (912)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".

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  (519): I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA". http://tfl.nu/ak7j
  Replies (9) Good night (3745) Bad night (1035)
• Favorite

  (417): View more from Missouri

  That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again

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  (417): That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again http://tfl.nu/ofmm
  Replies (37) Good night (7554) Bad night (1102)
• Favorite

  (865): View more from Tennessee

  What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?

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  (865): What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"? http://tfl.nu/h7i9
  Replies (11) Good night (2452) Bad night (1819)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...

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  (248): See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts... http://tfl.nu/yx0v
  Replies (5) Good night (1202) Bad night (634)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend

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  (+44): I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend http://tfl.nu/ua0w
  Replies (11) Good night (2478) Bad night (783)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.

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  (404): Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs. http://tfl.nu/h5fh
  Replies (7) Good night (1325) Bad night (637)
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH

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  (859): I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH http://tfl.nu/ebr6
  Replies (1) Good night (782) Bad night (574)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today

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  (614): Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today http://tfl.nu/chyo
  Replies (5) Good night (1044) Bad night (461)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  You can't spell "party" without "RA."

  (1-970): View more from Colorado

  You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."

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  (970): You can't spell "party" without "RA." (1-970): You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired." http://tfl.nu/jawl
  Replies (4) Good night (892) Bad night (458)
• Favorite

  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.

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  (918): I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now. http://tfl.nu/hh6j
  Replies (4) Good night (335) Bad night (546)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that

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  (630): They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that http://tfl.nu/580s
  Replies (4) Good night (822) Bad night (359)
• Favorite

  (269): View more from Michigan

  Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.

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  (269): Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had. http://tfl.nu/jcgm
  Replies (2) Good night (345) Bad night (140)

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