Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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