Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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