I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
