drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
We don't watch enough power rangers
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
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