It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
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