So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize
