is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
