you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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