I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
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