Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Randomize
