thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
