sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
