we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
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