pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
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