Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize