the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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