He disabled his match.com account in front of me
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize
