i just wanna soil my oats bro
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
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