me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
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