bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
