last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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