And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
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