I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
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I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
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I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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