Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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