Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
Randomize
