We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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